Hello healthy people...

Over the weekend I had the wonderful joy of bringing someone to the doctor's office (in this case it was a walk in clinic... which technically aren't all clinics walk in?) and as I sat there for what seemed like an eternity I began to compile a list of all the things that are prevalent in most doctor's office's.  While I was certainly glad that I wasn't the one that was sick, I've come to realize that the whole doctor's office experience is just as painful for the healthy and sick...

While I'm not proposing we all move to Canada for free health care of that we should set up a McDonald's type of Doctor's office... (but wouldn't it be great if we had a drive thru?)... it is funny to think that since they are dealing w/ OUR health it's definite that we are @ the mercy of Doctor's.  So w/ all the flu, germs, viruses, junk floating around I would like to get you ready for the doctor's office visit before you even go...

Here we go... the 5 tweezy rules to all doctor's offices: 

1. Magazines:

All doctor's office's are required to have the following magazine(s):

- a 3 year old Time magazine

-Highlights magazine for the little kids

-a 5 year old Sports Illustrated magazine (hey! the Buffalo bills are in the superbowl!)

-a pamphlet/magazine for old people

 2. "The Dr. will see you shortly":

This really means you're gonna be waiting around for about an hr. in the waiting room.. 30 minutes to see the nurse.. 45 minutes to actually see the doctor who will diagnose you in 3 minutes and walk out the door in 5 more minutes.

3. The music:

 Usually a mixture of light easy favorites and/or instrumental Muzak... if they are really funky the "jazz" it up w/ the "cool jazz" station.

4. Doctor's handwriting:

ILLEGIBLE!

5. No one talks in the waiting room:

The look of sickness combined w/ sadness over the copay mulitplied by the look from the flourescent lighting  subtracted by the frustration of filling out the forms equals....

NO SPEAKING.  Don't believe me?  Try sparking up a conversation w/ the person next to you about the daytime soap opera that is playing on the tv....

With all that being said... .  WASH YOUR HANDS...

currently reading: Acts 14 

-stay healthy.

tweezy 

Comments (18) >>

hate it too
written by Jonathan Cross, March 10, 2008

dude, first off lemme say that its an honor to be the first to post a comment on your blog of awesomeness.lol. but yeh, i rele hate going to the doctor. i never bother with those magizines or anything like that because like you said they're so outdated. but, just thought i'd tell you, u rock

...
written by Tia, March 10, 2008

What the heck? Man, I feel sorry for you. Who was sick? (I know, everyone at the doctor's, but you know what i mean!)
Once i went to the doctor's because my grandpa had a stiff neck and for some reason we ad to be there...there was this boy who was wearing one of those little paper masks to keep germs from spreading...he TAKES IT OFF and COUGHS RIGHT IN MY DIRECTION! i didn't come down with anything, and that proves how good our God is.

WAZ IT YOUR SON?
written by jazzmin, March 10, 2008

ok, i know you wrote this whole thing about being yourself and all, but i have to. anyway, feel better

...
written by anthony hockenberry, March 11, 2008

doctors offices are so irritating. it's like being sick isn't bad enough so you have to go there and sit through everyone else's misery. ha ha. that only adds to your problems. sometimes i wonder if i'm better off just staying home and sitting through it. i think most of those pills are just sugar capsules anyway. ha ha.

agree
written by MO, March 11, 2008

i so agree bout moving to Canada lol and wat is with the doctors they always look at you and go oh you got this and you always walk out of there with 50$ medican for an ear ach.lol (personly) so ya wats up with yall keep the Florida girl in your prays with FCAT (stupid florida test KJ52 can you relate) well love you all always in my prays
God bless
-Mo

I Hate The Doctor's Office Too
written by Alyssa, March 12, 2008

I had to the doctor on Monday and they said I have the Flu. I hate the doctor's office cause all these little kids run around screaming and wiping their little noses on the chairs. I'm new to your blog but I'm a big fan. You're awesome!!!!!!!!!!

Bugs inthe air
written by John P, March 12, 2008

I'm just glad that we only occupy space in the Dr. office for the time we do. How would you like to hang out around all those bugs floating in the air as a profession?

SO TRUE
written by they call me....RIZZA!!!, March 12, 2008

THAT IS SSSOOOO TRUE!!!
even in ER when u have appendicitis...I SO KNOW ABOUT THAT

once they finally found out i had appendicitis i did get to go right back and i had about a million people glaring at me as i walk throught the doors.....
it DID tkae 7 visits to the hospital to finally figure it all out...and a month to
I'M NOT KIDDING A WHOLE MONTH TO FIND OUT I HAD APPENDICITIS!!!!!! (no it dosn't always burst within 24 hrs of getting it...) AND THEN WHAT??
I HAVE SURGERY ON VALENTINES DAY!!!
and it STILL hurts....BLAH BLAH BLAH
don't ever have ur appendix out
and if u think u have it...read the classic appendicitis stroy from the book and tell them that so it dosn't take a month....lewt me tell Marissa codeine 2 hrs of sleep in the last week = vvveerrryyy interesting...i'm tellin ya...not somthing u want to see

Hey
written by Amber, March 13, 2008

I like those rules, and, I will folow them!
-Amber

Amazingly True.....
written by Emma, March 13, 2008

IT'S TRUE!!! Then that means that I'm not alone... I hate going there..... it's scary

heyyy
written by karlie, March 16, 2008

love ya website
u r sooooooooooooooo koooooooooooooooool

whatup
written by karlie, March 16, 2008

u make me smile a lot

Doctors!!
written by Dakota, March 16, 2008

Wouldn't that be awesome if there was a drive-thru at the doctor's office?? I like that my doctor uses beepers so u can sit in your car while waiting!!

to be honest...
written by Christina, March 17, 2008

Hey, Kj! sup? how u been? I've been wanting to write u a letter, but idk where to send it! can someone say porblemo? lol! but yeah, anywho, abotu docter's offices, they so scare me, cause of all the germs. YUCKKKYY!

...
written by Jeff, March 20, 2008

I like those rules too!

Doctors clinic - boring!!!!
written by Maria, March 25, 2008

All the clinics are seriously boring and are totally depressing.... I can sit there and the only entertainment is counting how many coughs are coughed also the people there are usally older people and crying babies and the mothers taking them outside to "quiet them" even if they never stop crying
CLINICS ARE BORING

...
written by Maria, March 25, 2008

I agree with your rules

NO MORE OPERAS
written by Maria, March 25, 2008

we should stop operas from ever happening on tv....... probably only your music playing in the backround you rock!
me <3 your music
like I said your music is the BEST IT rocks

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